Damian got behind me, wrapped his massive right arm around my neck and started squeezing. I could not breathe. I fought as hard as I possibly could, flailing my arms, throwing elbows, and pulling his arm in attempt to gasp for another breath. I could feel my life slipping away and knew I was closer to death than I had ever been in my entire life. “I’m too young to die,” I thought. “What about my girl?” What would happen to her?
It’s amazing how many thoughts flow through your head when you are close to death. I didn’t see a tunnel, or light, but I did see little star like glimpses and photographic types of images of my daughter as I was ready to slip into unconsciousness or possibly death.
There’s a vicious cycle that happens to women who are abused. You hear about the cycle of abuse all the time. You think you would never put up with being hurt emotionally or physically.
You think it will never happen to you. However, when it does, you quickly fall prey to the cycle with little to no awareness you are “that” woman. You are a victim of abuse and you are living the cycle.
Some of us live with horrid thoughts of the abuse we endured. We can easily relive memories of being hit or choked nearly to death. Some of us live with the feeling of unworthiness because of an unfaithful partner or spouse. Others live with the yearning for attachment and love because of abandonment by a loved one.
When you experience hurt like this, you put up a protective wall. Even though you may be strong enough to get out of the situation, you are still a victim. This you must come to terms with. However, the victim mentality can consume you and prevent you from ever truly loving or engaging again.
My point is here you can live stuck in your story for years. You can stay stuck your whole life if your story serves you well. I can tell you I’m being a bit sarcastic here. Staying stuck typically does not serve anyone well. Sometimes we become so emotionally attached to those negative glimpses of our past that we fail to truly live.
I believe with all my heart, mind, and soul that we were all destined for some type of greatness. To uncover our God-given talents there is something that we MUST do to finally move forward in life.
LET GO and LET LOVE…
I’m Jessica and this is my story. I believe that my struggles were placed before me for a reason. I’m here to walk hand in hand with you as you face your fears, overcome your past, and step into the big, bright future that awaits you.
If you are ready to take the steps necessary to TRANSFORM your life. I would love to connect with you in my FREE and PRIVATE community on Facebook. Click here to join——–>TRANSFORM YOUR WORLD.